I don’t like labels for me. I mean I really don’t. How we are divided into categories, even if they are ‘good’ ones, creates an us and them. It serves as a disconnect more than a clarification in my own experiences any way. Identifiers that puts us into little boxes and usually doesn’t end well. I don’t work well in any type of box, that’s for sure.
Now, I see how self identifying can be a source of strength, a way to take back one’s power, to take ownership. Take the sting, or power, out of a negative connotation. When done by the representative of a certain community, it’s a way to build or reinforce a sense of identity. So I guess it depends on who is doing it and what the motivation entails.
As far as me, you can refer to me anyway you want. You don’t really need my permission to do so, especially when behind my back. In that case you have officially made it none of my business and I respect and appreciate that!
I don’t consider myself an expert in anything but me. But then again when I am as accomplished as William White, MA Dr. Carl Hart, Ph.D. or Cher, maybe I will change my mind.
I have gone to school a long time and wrote about 1,000,000 papers. I do have to warn you I could probably beat you in Trivial Pursuit, as long as it is the psychology version, which they haven’t invented yet, so you safe for now. But as much as I love psychology and philosophy it is a facet of a multi-dimensional me, with room to grow.
I don’t mind labels elsewhere but go more for substance over style theses days.
I appreciate and understand the struggle of others, I mean as much as I can without experiencing it for myself. I can only base things on my own experience and learn about the experiences of others. I, always respectfully acknowledging, will never be fully able to feel how it feels, like anyone that had to or continues to have to fight for it.
When someone self-labels, or self-identifies, the self- part is an indication about who they are, their preference, or perhaps a reminder of where they came from and not go back. I get it, it can be a source of strength. I feel that way about being Jewish. I read someone’s post on Facebook yesterday. It made me really sad how the fight for acknowledgement of humanity is fought everyday, over, and over, and over, and over again, over being identified by someone other than onself. If someone has to fight that much for basic human rights like dignity and pronouns, give me a flag and I will wave it with you, guaranteed. I am with you on that.
I respect that and will call you whatever you prefer. If you have to fight for it then I will shout it on the mountain top. But for me, I am in a different situation. It makes me feel claustrophobic, like I have to perform in a certain way or I will let someone down. I will answer to my name. That is one identifier that I like very much.
I cannot be contained by any label. I have been so many things, to so many people. How could that define or describe me at all? It would be a snap shot, a moment in time captured forever. Whether it is ‘good’ or ‘bad’ it based in perception, not reality. It has no bearing on who I am. Limiting. It would only mean something to that someone who took it, not me. There is no label that would adequately encompass who I am. I am constantly evolving while being complete.
Shira Goldberg 